a lot of time and nothing to do

Pretty bored is an understatement. I have nothing to do with my time except sit around on my arse all day. Im kidsitting and its so dull, all i want to do is go out and meet up with friends and I simply can't. And then when it comes to the weekends I'm also working too. It means I hardly see anyone and its so dull. The only people that Id be able to see on a day to day basis are on holiday or working shifts which makes it hard to see them.

This kidsitting is over at the end of August, but it feels like Ive wasted so much time doing this. Fair enough its paying off some debts but it means Im constantly bored. My time could be better spent by me seeing my boyfriend for the week then coming home to work at weekends. Thankfully this is the last summer of kidsitting so I needent have a boredem like this for a long long while.

Im missing my boy a lot really, he hasnt even been gone a week and already Im getting a little depressed not having him around. It wouldnt be so bad if I was being kept busy, but im not, Im literally sitting at home thinking about how much I miss him. I really cannot wait for university to finish and for everything to start. Im mainly ready to move in with him, we've been living together since uni really, its just the holidays that are the problems. I really feel like im missing a part of me when he's not here. Needless to say I am irreversibly in love with him and i could happily settle down with him if he asked tomorrow. Its strange to think that if I had never met him Id be leading a different life. Im so glad that we did meet, Im much better for it.
Recently Ive been thinking about wanting babies, and the reality of it all is that its not going to happen! Not yet anyway. I think its better to start off with a puppy! Ive always wanted one and its as close as im going to get to having a baby. Besides, I had read this article on couples who dont have children and how they have so much more time and money for themselves. Their lifestyle seems very appealing. But then so does family life. As it was mentioned, my mother said that I have my whole life ahead of me, so there is no need to start thinking about having children now. I guess she's right. Infact, I couldnt have children for a while as was discussed with some friends over lunch, there is a lot to acheive before that, its a lot of responsibility.

Looking through my diary, ive got less kidsitting than i thought. Ive actually only got ten days left. When i look at it like that, it seems a lot easier to deal with! Maybe I should stop complaining about it seeing as its nearly over! Even though there isnt a lot to do, its draining. We've started watching season one of 24, so that will pass the time a hell of a lot quicker!

Having so much time on my hands Ive been thinking about my life plan, where i want to move to what job to have etc and i realise its a complete waste of thought. None of those things are going to happen in the next year and so its pointless thinking about it. Ive come to the conclusion that things arent worth worrying about or mentioning unless they have happened. No point going on about me wanting to move unless i have moved. Its just a waste of energy really.

Im looking forward to my boy coming back from holiday and the v short one night stay that he's having here. Ive only just started working weekends, and already its screwing up my time!
I think I should find a book to read to pass the time, and probs some magazines. Maybe ill get on the nintendo ds and play some games.....who knows.

MPR
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